THE RISE OF THE CUCKOO CHURCH

A Satirical Field Guide to Modern “Christian” Remarriage Culture Picture it: Every Sunday morning across America, churches proudly hosting potlucks, praise teams, and - let’s just say it - a staggering population of remarried divorcees lekking around like sanctified cuckoo birds. You know, the bird that lays its eggs in someone else’s nest and flies off like it’s the most normal thing in the world? Yes, that bird. Turns out, it has become the unofficial mascot of the modern American church.

THE CUCKOO BIRD & THE CUCKOLD BELIEVER A brief field guide A cuckoo bird: “A bird that lays its eggs in the nest of another bird and lets someone else raise its mess.” A modern remarried divorcee in the church: “A person who lays foreign eggs in someone else’s covenantal marriage and then asks the pastor to bless the scrambled leftovers.”

And the church?

They observe approvingly as if they are watching the latest Hallmark Holiday Romance flick.

I. THE SCRIPTURES DON’T SUPPORT THE CIRCUS

Marriage ends only by death - not by adultery, not by boredom, not by ‘we fell out of love.’

“The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth.”

1 Corinthians 7:39 KJV

“Till death do us part” wasn’t invented by Hallmark; it’s straight Scripture.

Nowhere - NO WHERE -

does God say:

“Verily, if thou art unhappy, file thou the paperwork at the Roman courthouse.”

BUT today's churches proudly perform remarriages like they’re handing out raffle tickets at a county fair, as long as their STATE MASTER SAYS IT IS ORDERED. They have removed Christ as Lord and now worship worldly government.

II. FORNICATION ≠ ADULTERY (FACTS CHURCHES PRETEND DON’T EXIST)

Jesus gave one exception for “putting away”:

“Except it be for fornication…”

Matthew 19:9 (KJV)

Not adultery.

FORNICATION - premarital impurity under Jewish betrothal law (Deut. 22).

Meaning:

If a woman lied about her virginity before consummation, the marriage could be annulled.

But once the covenant was sealed?

NOTHING breaks it but death.

Not cheating.

Not contrived "abuse."

Not drama.

Not betrayal.

Not judicial orders.

Not even “My pastor said God wants me happy.”

III. SCRIPTURE CALLS REMARRIAGE ADULTERY. PERIOD.

Jesus didn’t stutter:

“Whoso marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.”

Luke 16:18 (KJV)

“So they shall call the people that are called by My Name: adulterous generation.”

Wisdom of Solomon 14:12 (Apocrypha)

Your favorite Christian influencer may disagree.

Jesus doesn’t care.

IV. WIDOWS GET A PASS - BIBLE SAID SO

Just to be fair:

The Bible honors remarriage for widows.

“If her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.”

1 Corinthians 7:39 KJV

Death ends covenants.

Not adultery.

Not emotions.

Not incompetently written articles from Christianity Today.

Not long winded monologues by pope-like pastors.

Widows remarried?

Bless them.

Divorcees remarried?

Let’s just say …

beep-beep… the cuckoo bird has entered the sanctuary.

V. EXCOMMUNICATION IS BIBLICAL. MODERN SOFTNESS IS NOT.

Paul didn’t say:

“Smile at them in the foyer and give them a role in the children’s ministry.”

He said:

“Put away from among yourselves that wicked person.”

1 Corinthians 5:13 KJV

And Ecclesiasticus (Apocrypha) doubles down:

“Give not thy soul unto a woman to set her foot upon thy substance.”

Sirach 9:2

Paul and Sirach tag-teaming like WWE champions.

The modern church?

They treat adulterous remarriage like a quirky personality trait:

“Oh, Steve has gluten intolerance, Mary has anxiety,

and Schmitty is in his third ‘Kingdom marriage.’

Let’s all give Schmitty a hand!”

VI. ANATOMY OF THE CHURCH CUCKOLD

You can spot him in any congregation:

THE CUCKOLD CHRISTIAN™

divorced three times

remarried to someone else’s wife

Wife swapping, as if she's a white elephant gift

taking communion like it’s a breath mint

singing “I Speak Jesus” while living in perpetual adultery

and somehow still lecturing others about morality

Brothers and sisters…

if hypocrisy had feathers, it would look exactly like that cartoon cuckoo bird on your screen.

VII. THE COMEDY OF IT ALL

Imagine this as a nature documentary:

“Here we observe the American Church Cuckold nesting in a pew that belongs to another covenant. Notice how he fluffs his feathers while reciting verses about holiness he does not personally obey.”

Attenborough would be ashamed.

VIII. THE CALL TO ACTION: STOP PRETENDING THE CIRCUS IS A CHURCH

If you call yourself a Christian, Scripture demands:

1. Recognize adulterous remarriage as ongoing sin.

Luke 16:18

Mark 10:11–12

Romans 7:2–3

2. Stop calling adultery a “new season.”

It’s not a season.

It’s a scandal.

3. Stop treating covenant vows like cell phone contracts, "get a new contract and you get a new phone."

“You can cancel anytime!”

No. You can’t.

4. Stop enabling cuckoo-bird Christianity.

If someone lays spiritual eggs in another man’s covenant nest,

stop pretending it’s "under the blood."

5. Demand the restoration of church discipline.

Because until adultery is confronted,

the church has no authority to confront anything else.